Let it go

Bearing with one another and,

if one has a complaint against another, 

forgiving each other,

as the Lord has forgiven you,

so you also must forgive.

Colossians 3:13

Forgetting what lies behind and

straining forward to what lies ahead.

Philippians 3:13

Forgive and forget?  Forgive, yes.  But forgiveness does not require us to forget. The Hebrew meaning behind the word forgetting is "letting go".  The memory remains, but we do not live in the memory.  We live as if we do not remember it.  And when we do remember, we have the ability to see through the filter of grace. 

The moment we truly forgive, something beautiful happens...we no longer allow the hurt to control our behavior and our actions.  Our thoughts are no longer held in a prison cell. As we let go, we have the ability to move on.  We are free. 

We are to forgive as Jesus forgives us.  His forgiveness cost him... his life.  So it is with us.  Forgiveness is an act of selflessness.  It's not easy.  It requires strength. We strain forward to what lies ahead.  It's there that I find peace. 

To forgive means to stop, to cease, to grant pardon, to give up.  I've heard the phrase, "Don't give up".  So this act of forgiving goes against every grain that I have instilled in my heart.  I fight it.  I listen to the whispers inside my heart that say, "Don't stop. Don't give up. You have every right".  

But what is it exactly that I am called to forgive and let go of?  Anything that is keeping me from moving forward... anything that is keeping me from being all that God has created me to be. 

So as I forgive, I give up. I let it go.  

Where feet fail

I fall.  God picks me up.  Again, I fall.  And again, he picks me up, dusting off the dirt from my fall, setting me back on my feet in hopes that a lesson was learned. And yet again, I fall.  Sinking.

It's a vicious cycle.  I am not perfect.  I fall, I fail. Time and time again.  Through this, I am realizing how unbelievably patient God is with me.  He waits for me.   Never allowing my spiritual mood swings to deter him from pursuing me.  He offers me a second chance... a third chance... a gazillionth chance to obey him, to trust him, to believe him. 

I am living proof of his patience. He patiently works with my weakness. He's not asking for me to do more for him.  He is actually looking for more of me.  More of my trust.  More of my heart.

This is not an excuse to slack off.  Quite the contrary.  God will still discipline and correct me. For out of his discipline, he reveals his vast love for me.  His patience compels me.  I desire to live a life that strives to do my best for my heavenly Father.  To listen and obey.  To trust him with my life no matter how much fear surrounds me.

He lifted me out of the slimy pit,

out of the mud and mire;

he set my feet upon a rock

making my steps secure.

Psalm 40:2 

God has never failed me. I will let him lead my next steps by his sovereign hand.  My faith will stand.  My trust will grow.  Even if it means dusting off and trying again for the umpteenth time.  I will not be discouraged, for he is patient with me.

Listen: Oceans, by Hillsong United

Genuine kindness

March is a month full of birthdays for my family.  So many celebrations. So many gifts.  A friend of mine just had her birthday a few days ago and said the only gift she wanted was for everyone she knew to do a random act of kindness that day.  Most gifts come and go, get old, fade away... but the gift of kindness has a lasting affect. 

Don't get me wrong, I love getting showered with gifts.  Blessings come in all shapes and sizes.  But the most genuine gift I have ever received-- the greatest blessing I have ever had bestowed upon me is this...

...Christ in [me], the hope of glory.

Colossians 1:27

It's an immeasurable gift.  So rich in love.  I don't deserve it, but God's grace says I do.

For it is by grace you have

been saved through faith. 

And this is not your own doing;

it is the gift of God,

not a result of works,

so that no one may boast.

Ephesians 2:8

It's the only gift that offers genuine security. I have been saved. My salvation is fully secured.  It's not something anyone or anything else can give me.  It's not something I can accomplish myself.

It's not a "if I just try harder then God will notice me" gift.  It's not a "look what I did, look how awesome and perfect I have lived my life" mentality.  It's all about faith.  Knowing that I did absolutely nothing to deserve it, yet humbly accepting the gift that was ever so graciously given to me in kindness.  

This is not a random act of kindness. This one was mapped out and wrapped up before the beginning of time and had my name, and yours, written on the gift tag. 

This is not the end

He will wipe away every tear 

from their eyes,

and death shall be no more,

neither shall there be mourning,

nor crying, nor pain anymore,

for the former things have passed away.

 

And he who was seated 

on the throne said, 

"Behold, I am making all things new".

And he also said,

"Write this down for these words

are trustworthy and true". 

Revelation 21:4-5

Yesterday we celebrated the life of a remarkable young man surrounded by hundreds of people who all loved him. We will miss him tremendously.  The service, stunning.  The support, incredible.  The emotions, exhausting. Tears, laughter, tears, laughter.... Shawn always had a way of adding comic relief. 

A friend of mine introduced me to a song that spoke directly to my heart this morning. It's a sweet reminder.  Our lives on this earth are but a vapor in the wind; but when it ends, it is just the beginning of eternity. I can't even begin to wrap my mind around the meaning of timelessness. For Shawn, this is not the end, this is just the beginning. It is life everlasting, forever and ever and ever.... With the Creator and Lover of his soul.  Life with no more tears, no more death, no more pain, no more suffering... not a single ounce of it.  I have that same hope, that very same promise. Do you? 

 

It is my prayer that Shawn's legacy will continue to be passed down through family and friends for generations to come.  To God be ALL the glory.  

The journey continues.

This is not the end, by Gungor (click to listen)

This is not the end

This is not the end of this
We will open our eyes wide, wider

This is not our last

This is not our last breath

We will open our mouths wide, wider

And you know you'll be alright

Oh and you know you'll be alright

This is not the end

This is not the end of us

We will shine like the stars bright, brighter

Embrace today

Today I was reminded to choose joy.  To accept the season of life I am currently in.  To not live in the past or the future, but to embrace the here and now.  And to do it without grumbling, without complaining, and without arguing.  Learning to be content... no matter what the circumstances.

What a difference it would make if I woke up with this mentality and perspective on a daily basis.  To embrace the ordinary, everyday tasks. Not worrying about what the future holds, but living within the boundaries of today.  Only setting foot on what is presently before me with joy instead of complaints.  

This is the day that 

the LORD has made,

so I will rejoice and be glad in it.

Psalms 118:24

Remember not the former things,

nor consider the things of old.

Isaiah 43:18

Therefore, do not be anxious 

about tomorrow,

for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. 

Sufficient for the day 

is it's own trouble.

Matthew 6:34 

So I embrace the here and now; because you see, it is here that I have the opportunity to respond, to learn, and to grow as I rest in the arms of my Heavenly Father... today.

The utmost capacity

I have come that they may have life 

and have it to the full.

John 10:10

Jesus comes to me and he offers me life... to it's utmost capacity.

Not in fancy, fleeting pleasures.

Life will still contain struggles, heartache and sorrows.  Trouble and distress are interwoven into this fallen and broken world. But Jesus gives me the ability to respond to these difficulties with grace and meaning.  I have abundant life empowered by him.  I am filled to the brim with his love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self control.  He equips me. He fills me. I am satisfied.

I have life and I have it to the full.

Live life to the fullest capacity.

Perfect peace

"You keep him in perfect peace

whose mind is stayed on you,

because he trusts in you".

Isaiah 26:3

Anxiety has a way of creeping into the mind; and if not careful, it will take up residence there with or without permission.  It's chains can grow thick.  Holding the prisoner in the whirlwind of inner turmoil.  It's an unpleasant place to be.

We can try to control it.  Some will excessively prepare, while others perfectly plan out their lives.  But who can really see what the future holds?  

We weren't designed to see that far.  We were created with a need to be in constant communication with the ultimate Planner of our lives.  As we draw closer to the Prince of Peace, we will experience the calm.

The whirlwind will cease.  The chains will be chiseled by his mighty hand.  It's up to us to break free. 

So I take captive every thought that enters my mind to obey the One who lives inside of me. I am drawn back to the awareness of Jesus...his presence which surrounds me every moment of every day.  I keep my mind focused on Him.  It's a total act of trust.  Knowing that his peace will surpass the realm of my understanding.

Peace. It's not a feeling.  It's an unchangeable condition.

Peace is not the absence of affliction, but the presence of God.

~anonymous

Legacy

I have told you this so that 

my joy may be in you

and that your joy may be complete.
John 15:11

A miracle happened today.  Shawn entered into the sweet presence of our loving heavenly Father.  Oh the glory!  Oh to see the smile that will forever be upon his face.  That infectious smile!  My heart aches. It is heavy. But my spirit...it is full of joy and wonder.

A few days ago, as he lay incoherent in his hospital bed, he spoke clearly saying, "God has a plan and a purpose. This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Hallelujah! I can do this. I did it in front of you, Father".
Then, in typical Shawnsington fashion, he led us in song (swaying his hand like a conductor):
It is well... it is well.
With my soul... with my soul.
It is well, it is well, with my soul!!!!

His faith never waivered.  He stayed strong till the bitter end. 

I stand in awe of the beauty of his legacy.   

Imagine for a moment.  The journey of your life coming to an end.  The curtains close.  You take your final bow.  The applause of heaven.  The standing ovation.   You look ahead and He is there... Jesus.  He claps his hands for you and says,  "Well done, good and faithful servant, well done". 

What legacy will you leave behind? 

Glorious grace

To the praise of his glorious grace,

which he has freely given us 

in the One he loves.

In him we have redemption

through his blood,

the forgiveness of sins in accordance

with the riches of God's grace 

that he lavished on us.

Ephesians 1:6-8

Grace.  I am undeserving of this gift. This beautiful gift. Freely given. There is nothing that I have done to receive it.

It has been lavished upon me... in glorious abundance.

Even as I grieve, there are echoes of his grace.  As the end draws near, we come face to face with Jesus... the ultimate grace.

This is an expression of his love.  He swapped my sin for his righteousness on the cross.

So I stand in the downpour.  It covers me.  All my shortcomings, my fears and failures, all my guilt, my shame and inadequacies.  His grace meets me where I am and refuses to leave me the way that I was.

Listen: Grace So Glorious by London Gatch

One sweet day I will see Jesus face to face.  For all eternity I will say, "Worthy is the One who is crowned in glory. Holy are you, Lord".

Nothing is wasted

And we know that for those

who love God all things work together

for good for those who were called

according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28

There has never been a time in history that God has ever failed.  That is the God I serve.  That is the God I love.  That is the God I trust.  He uses the bad and brings good out of it.  Every. single. time.  He does not make bad things happen, but he uses it... for good.  He will revive, rebuild, restore. 

He works all things for good.  He has a purpose and a plan.  He is worthy of my trust.

Sometimes God waits for bad to get worse so that when the battle is over we have no doubt that it was him who brought us out.

Listen: Nothing is Wasted by Elevation Worship

Finding joy in the journey

From the highest mountaintop to the deepest valley.  From the twists and turns to the straight and forward motion.  From the sweetest moments to the ugliest, dire circumstances.  The back and forths, the ups and downs, the ins and outs.

This is the journey.  The journey of life.

Always be joyful.

Never stop praying.

Be thankful in all circumstances.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Rejoice always?  Yes... always.  It's not an option for me.  Joy is praise.  Joy is my weapon.  It's not about pretending that everything is peachy keen.  It's about having an attitude that says, "no matter what life throws my way, it will never cause me to grow disillusioned with my Savior".  Even when it takes every ounce of strength to put a smile on my face.  I choose joy.  

Never stop praying?  How is that even possible?  The demands of life pull me in so many ways.  I am busy.  But prayer has become a part of who I am.  It's not something I go and do, it's like breathing. A constant state of living in the presence of a loving and powerful God.  It's not a way for me to get what I want.  It's a way for me to plug into his power and remain in his will.  It's an attitude of the heart.

It's easy to be thankful for something you love, but what if the very thing that is given to us is far from lovely?  I'm not thankful FOR my circumstances.  I am thankful IN them.   I am thankful that God promises to never leave me.   He is there with me, carrying me, holding me, never letting me go.  He is the one who is strengthening me, protecting me, loving me and guiding me even through the most difficult of days.  In my circumstances, he is still there. And for that, I am thankful.

Never stop rejoicing.  Never stop praying. Never stop thanking him. ever.  

That is how I find joy in the journey.

Give me faith

How is it that I can believe in something that may not have any tangible proof? To trust in something that I have absolutely zero control over? 

The answer is simple. Faith.

Now faith is being sure

of what we hope for

and certain of what we do not see. 

Hebrews 11:1

It's a choice.  A gift to either be accepted or rejected.

  

We all have faith in something.

I have faith in a Sovereign God. I have faith that he loves me and that nothing can separate me from that love.  His sovereignty is beyond my pea-sized-brain of comprehension. I simply trust that he is the One who created me and the entire universe in which I live.  He rules over all and is in control. Yet within that control, he gives free will.  A choice.  A choice to love him back.  A choice to have faith and keep the faith regardless of the outcome of my circumstances.  I have faith that God has a purpose and a plan for my life and that my faith will continue to grow stronger as a result of difficulties and bliss.  

I have faith that my yesterdays will remind me of God's goodness & love and that today's struggles will strengthen me for what lies ahead tomorrow. 

The song linked below is my prayer:
Jesus, Give me faith. To trust what you say. That you're good. And your love is great.

Listen: "Give Me Faith" by Chris Brown